Connection before logistics—or friends.

I once attended a birthday party for a six-year-old and noticed that, as each mom arrived to pick up her child, she greeted the mother of the birthday girl before greeting her own child. In several cases, the child would try to get her attention and the mom would tell the child not to interrupt. What kind of message does that give the child? That she’s not important. In his book, First Things First, Stephen Covey reminds us that life is more likely to turn out the way we want if we focus on those activities that are “important and not urgent.”  Use any urgency as a reminder to stop and decide what’s most important at this moment. One practical way I apply this to my life, which greatly eases the stress of daily mechanics, is to practice connecting before logistics.

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With this fresh on my mind, several days later as I went to daycare to pick up my six-year-old, I made a special effort to connect with her first thing. Within seconds, Pam arrived. She and I had been playing phone tag for days, planning a school picnic. “Vickie!” she shouted hurrying toward us. It took every bit of self-control to stay focused on my child, but I did. Connection before logistics—or friends.